I miss this:

"Hi Be' what time will you sleep? Please wait for me to get home and open the gate for me ;-)"

But this time around, my mom barged in my room.

Mom: Why are you still awake??
Bea: Umm, hehe..
Mom: You're waiting for your dad again no? Yan ang hirap pag nakikisabay lang eh! You have no control over what time you get home.

Sometimes I think my mom has two children. Hihi.

I created a tumblr account for the same reasons as you have, without knowing you had one. And we have the same layout, except mine's orange. What the hell hahaha. I believe that we are still meant to be groupmates/classmates/blockmates :))

Time does not heal all wounds because we remember, and because we remember, we despair. The degree of this despair may be toned down by time, but the fact that certain emotions still resurface means that memories are forever stored even in the deepest recesses of our minds.

Dory: Are you my conscience?
Marlin: Yes, I'm your conscience. We haven't spoken for a while. How are you?
Dory: Meh. Can't complain.
Marlin: Huh. Good. Tell me, Dory, do you see anything?
Dory: Yeah, I see a light.
Marlin: A light?
Dory: Yeah. I see a light. Hey conscience, am I dead?
Marlin: No, no, I see it too.
Dory: It's so pretty...
Marlin: I feel... happy. Which is a big deal... for me.
   

I DIE.

Sometimes, to make way for something new, you have to replace the old.

I hate this, constantly finding myself in the same situation, but different in a literal pilosopo kind of way (e.g. different time).

Or maybe I should stop blaming everything on external forces and start fixing myself.

On a semi-related note (only related in the sense of having change), I should also start the new year right by sleeping EARLY! (Hello Isaw haha). Also, I splurged on a Fully Booked notebook a while ago. New year = new notebook = new grades. Hopefully it works this time!

"Are you still awake?"
"Yup! What time will you be home?"
"Around 1-2 am... Could you open the gate for me?"
"Okay!"
"I'm tipsy... hehehehehehe"

Guess which one's me and which one's my dad.

This feels weird. :))

I had a freakishly vivid dream as well. Maybe it's an in thing these days!

Anyway, to make my long dream short, frat boys went to Ateneo and started grabbing random people and were sawing them on the nape and/or hitting them with hammers. IT WAS HORRIBLE I'm so traumatized =)) They didn't catch me because I was hiding under a table in the Sec B foyer, and for some reason they couldn't find me there (wtf).

We skipped Chapter 4 in Psych so I don't know anything about dreams or sleep :(

P.S. I want to be a Hittite warrior :))

I was happily eating my favorite chocolate coated strawberries blizzard when suddenly, there was something in my ice cream that didn't look right.

It was black, string-like, and curly.

It was armpit or pubic hair. DUN DUN DUN.
(or maybe it was something that strongly resembled both, I wouldn't really know)

I dragged Stephen back to DQ but he refused to go back in since he "hated confrontations" of any sort. I wasn't even planning to scream or anything. Boo.

Anyway, so when I went back into the holy grounds of Dairy Queen, I went up to the cashier, gave her a sad look from the bottom of my broken heart and said, "Why is there hair in my ice cream :("

She shocked-ly took my ice cream and showed it to her co-workers. They huddled around it, expressed their disgust in a variety of eews (e.g. eew, yuck, gross, kadirs), until one person concluded "MALAMANG LALAKI GUMAWA NIYAN!"

They gave me another free ice cream, but I wasn't able to finish it.

:(

On the lighter note, Rodney claims that the piece of hair might just be the secret ingredient of Dairy Queen. Hoho :>

Happy eating people!

I'm laying off parties as of now, and my plan on attempting to drop by all 3 parties later shall be cancelled (not to mention, I also think it's impossible). I think I can die now from the heavenly cinnamon drink Buga or Brut brought. I will be literally pooping gold soon.

My back can now be compared to a world map, with so much land and sea that is allergy.

I shall be sober till the 22nd. See ya lovers! :)

Aside from the cold Christmas-y breeze, I finally got the genuine hang of Christmas spirit by adding up everything that transpired this day.

Dairy Queen + karaoke at Eastwood (breakthrough performance: Roxy and I rapped IN DA CLUB by "50 CENTS") + simbang gabi + indigenous food (as Leiron fondly calls bibingka, etc) + Love Actually + freecut everything on the last day of school + lovely lovely friends = CHRISTMAS SPIRIT WOOHOO!






Finally :)

Choke choke choke choke choooke :|

"Buti pa sa school, lesson muna bago test. Sa totoong buhay kasi test muna eh, bago mo malaman yung lesson."

Yown :))

New icons! Because I haven't seen Jackie in the longest time. And since new pictures are rare, I decided to make icons!

I've been putting off schoolwork since Friday. What a way to start the sem, yes? :)) :(

P.S. Reminder! Fishdaaa = Bea, Nyerrr = Jackie. Do not be confused, yay. I still can't take the sabawness that is our username. Haha.

Miss you Jackieee! You got out of EGI last night! :D

What's fun about living beside a small coffee shop is that you get free live acoustic music. All of them are cover songs, both local and international. No jologs. It's much more fun listening to them than itunes or youtube.

What keeps me amused week after week is the gig's unpredictability. Plus, the singers are usually hit or miss.

They sang "Every Little Thing He Does is Magic" thrice already. Are they keeping track of their songlist, or is it a crowd favorite??

Currently, a girl is singing "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne. She's struggling to hit all the high notes. The song is full of high notes. Therefore, she's struggling with the whole song. Mom and I feel tired for her :)) She should've gotten another one :O

The man before her had a beautiful voice. He was singing ala Jason Mraz. The rendition became an epic fail when he hit the chorus.

"I'll stop the world and melts with you"

:(

Till the next barok singer. Last week, "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" was sung as I don't want to fowhl asleep plus the switest drim will never do. Fun and relaxing times :)

[EDIT] The girl is singing "Torpe" by the Hungry Young Poets and she sounds exactly like Barbie! Amazing :)

I've been trying to write something lengthy about ASLA, something personal or better yet, something insightful or inspiring. I wouldn't be able to convince you all that ASLA was life-changing by saying "ASLA was life-changing", right?

With that, I find myself at a continual loss for words. I think I'm scared of writing something that I wouldn't be satisfied with after, or something I would reread and look back at as "just another tribute".

I would like to begin by saying that I hate beginnings. Whether starting an academic paper, staring blankly at an empty word document, or starting anew in a metaphorical sense, I hate it. I hate the idea of starting from scratch. I hate the feeling of being at the bottom, of erasing, of starting. Tabula rasa and I are not friends!

Starting college for me could be described as the latter part of a log jam, where all the passion in high school was built up slowly and upon reaching the peak, it's an instant plunge into a pool of pessimism. In other words, passion was a dead corpse pretending to be alive.

Every single day that I dragged my feet to school, one question kept pounding my head. Have you done anything meaningful lately? Math was harsh on me, so 'have you done anything meaningful lately' was replaced by 'Tangina makaka-stay ba ko sa ME'.

Second year came, and 'tangina naka-stay nga ako sa ME' (for now) was replaced by Do something with your life!

I joined ASLA, and apparently it was a huge step in achieving this.

To my dismay, and to quote my batchmate Evan, ASLA destroyed us. Physically, mentally, and the harshest of all, emotionally. Everyday our bodies ached more, and moreso did our minds and hearts. Everything we previously knew and believed in was shattered, destroyed, and challenged.

What I find ironic is that you see things clearly when you're at the bottom. It's like you're forced to achieve nirvana. And when you're at the bottom, you don't push others further down; you help each other up. As one batch, we prove to be a living example (Leadership by example, yes?). We learned together, we supported each other, and I could proudly say (without consulting everyone individually!) that we grew to be better people; better students, servant-leaders, and citizens of this nation.

Before entering ASLA we were 37 individuals. At the beginning of the congress, it was made clear that we would all start at the bottom, hence we were all equal. At the end of it all, we emerged as one batch, ready to create ripples of change.

What sets this apart from everything I've been to in the past is that a number of weeks have already passed, and my passion has not faltered. In fact, it has never burned stronger. I'm sure there are 36 more people to back me up on this.

In fact, you don't have to attend such things like retreats or congresses to make you feel like you could save the world (But I do strongly, highly, super duper-ly recommend applying for ASLA! :D). Be idealistic, dream big, want world peace (with sincerity, haha) or whatever because these things are free and your imagination is limitless. Don't let anything stop you, because you own your thoughts and you own your dreams. Tao lang ako? That excuse must seriously end. Student lang ako? So freaking what. Pilipino lang kasi ako. The lang part should be removed for the betterment of our self-esteem and nationalism.

Hmm. I've never written anything this long since my last research paper.

I guess beginnings aren't so bad after all.